STAY OUT OF THEIR PROBLEMS ‘Femi Adekunle on Parenting Stay out of their problems – when I was growing up, my parents had this understanding. They allowed us to suffer the consequences of our actions. And if we were stupid, we bore the brunt of our stupidity. My parents would not shout themselves hoarse at…
Parenting: DON’T JUST PREPARE, DEVELOP* ‘ Femi Adekunle on Parenting To be up-to-date with your child, you must update. The place of preparation in parenting can not be overemphasised. However, development is superior to preparation. In other words, development is the superlative version of preparation. When all you do is prepare but fail to further…
NEVER EXCLUDE THEM FROM DECISION-MAKING ‘ Femi Adekunle on Parenting One of the big mistakes parents make is to think that the children are too immature to understand the running of the family, hence when decisions are made, they are relegated to irrelevance and excluded. Years back I was to consult with a nutritionist/dietician who…
YOU WILL NEVER BE THEIR ONLY ‘PARENT’ ‘Femi Adekunle on Parenting Growing up in those days, we were weaned to respect, value, and appreciate the extended family system, which is one of the strengths of our African cultural setting. We grew up being close to our cousins, aunties, uncles, and grandparents. I recollect that many…
TREAT THEM FAIRLY BUT NOT EQUALLY ‘Femi Adekunle on Parenting Sounds strange, doesn’t it? A wise man once said that there is no greater inequality than the equal treatment of unequal. Having to raise more than 2 children has strongly reinforced my belief in this saying even much more. On a daily basis, I…
NEVER GET TIRED OF GIVING INSTRUCTIONS When we were young, I remember my parents always screaming in my dialect alaigboran! Meaning that we were quite stubborn and disobedient. Now, as a parent, I can’t count how many times I have screamed the same frustration on my children! Imagine having to remind your grown-up children to…
THEIR NATURE DETERMINES HOW YOU NURTURE THEM Having many children has really opened my eyes to the depth of individual child uniqueness, more so when you have twins. For the twins, I discovered that different things excite, motivate, challenge, and upset them. While one of them thrives in an atmosphere of competition, i.e., motivated by…
HOW TRULY INTELLIGENT ARE YOUR KIDS? DISCOVER IT! As a young lad, I loved playing soccer. In those days, there were no computers, let alone computer games. Recreation for kids did not offer too many options, nor was it as sophisticated and diverse as it is today. Hence, many of us boys growing up played…
AVOID ROLE STEREOTYPES ‘Femi Adekunle on Parenting I once sat to counsel a woman whose worry and complaint were that her teenage son was not masculine enough. Her concern? He always dodged the ‘masculine’ chores in the house, like washing cars, fixing broken things, carrying heavy stuff, and the likes. Rather, he loved to do…
MENTORING YOUR CHILDREN ‘Femi Adekunle on Parenting My daughter is quite reserved. She matured emotionally quite fast. As she entered her teenage years, we really didn’t have problems with her in the areas where her age mates usually prove difficult. However, as a result of her reserved nature, she withheld some information from us, not…
