THE PURPOSE OF LIFE IS BIGGER THAN RAISING CHILDREN ‘Femi Adekunle on Parenting

THE PURPOSE OF LIFE IS BIGGER THAN RAISING CHILDREN

‘Femi Adekunle on Parenting

I did make the point in my last article that your children are not more important than your spouse. Neither, I now say, are they more important than you. Let me explain.

Sacrificial parents labour, toil and slave for their children. They give up a lot to give them the best. I know mums who sold clothing and jewellery to give their children sound education. They worked round the clock to put food on the table. These mums and dads obviously are the heroes of parenting. I however know such parents who, after striving and straining, died of exhaustion and never lived to reap the fruits of their labour; this is the sad part of the story. Parental exhaustion is real in many homes and it leads to depression, untimely death and even suicide.

I love watching the mother hen feed her newly-hatched chicks. She is so maternal and affectionate that she uses her worn beak to break down big grains. I however observed that in the process, in-between feeding her chicks, she feeds herself, and that’s where she gets the energy to get going and nurture her restless, ever-demanding chicks. Don’t get me wrong. I am by no means downplaying the place of sacrificial parenting.

One of the vacations one must take in a year is one dedicated to oneself. It may be just three days or four, or even less, but the important thing is that it’s needful (not sure I’m not guilty myself). It’s a time to refresh, revitalise and re-energise. There are times you need to take yourself out and give yourself a treat. There are times you need to take a decision that pleases you, as opposed to pleasing the entire family – you have done that all your life – as long as the decision is not harmful to the collective interest. Life is not just about them, it is about you also. The assignment of life transcends raising children which, if you find; its combination with your parenting responsibility and other functions, together, will only make you a fulfilled person. What is your passion? What are your interests? What are your hobbies? What is that one thing that tirelessly fires your enthusiasm? Never give it up because you have children. Get a life. Note, that the extent to which you pursue purpose is the prototype they are waiting in the wings to model for the pursuit of their own purpose, also.

The assignment of life transcends raising children …. the extent to which you pursue purpose is the prototype they are waiting in the wings to model for the pursuit of their own purpose, also.

‘Femi Adekunle, a Parenting and Family Coach, writes from Abuja, Nigeria.

Email: femi383@gmail.com

WhatsApp: 08055103512

10th May, 2026